Friday, September 22, 2006

You know you're a gun nut when....

You buy reloading dies for a gun you don't even own!!!!

At least I got a good deal.

(44 mag carbide RCBS $28)

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Say What?

Say What part one: Quote of the day

Joe Carter: "Anyone who thinks the Democratic Party is good for the poor or minorities or thinks that Republicans are for small government hasn't been paying attention."

Say What part the second:

I didn't see this coming.

Friday, September 15, 2006


I am going golfing this weekend. One last hurrah with a college buddy before I put away the clubs for the year. It is now huntin' season, with seasons for various species now open or opening soon. As usual, I am not prepared, not having enough shotgun shells loading, nor deer loads perfected, nor bow sighted in and practiced, etc. But if the lawn will stop forcing me to mow thrice weekly and I get my potatoes dug, I still have some time to get ready.

My suspicions were confirmed. My wife stayed down there all day and half the night, to get Ty's autograph. She did finally get it, at least that is what she claims it is. I could not discern anything in the scribbling on the paper that she showed me. So she stood around all day, and came home footsore, hungry, and thirsty, just to see Ty. Luckily, he wasn't too friendly, or this might have ended up like a country song. He came down the line, signing stuff, not saying anything, and when he saw my wife, he said "hey how ya doing?" or something like that. That's right, the only one he spoke to was my wife. I knew that I should be worried. Fortunately, she was too starstruck and weak in the knees to jump the barricade. So she came home, we met for supper at Applebees. Marital bliss resumes. I think I may have to ban that show on the premises though.

Today I will be passing by the Cabelas store, so I am pondering a shopping list. If I don't go in with a list, I might go nuts and could come out with maxed out credit cards. Self control is tough in such a place.

Everyone say a prayer for Jeff. I wish him a speedy recovery.

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Extreme Home Makeover, Giraffe Edition

A big deal in my area now is the house for Extreme Makeover Home Edition. They are building it about 30 miles from my house. I went down there on Sunday with Mrs. Giraffe. We parked in a wheatfield 2 miles from the house, waited in line for 45 minutes to get on a bus, got to the site and them stood around watching them paint and put up stone on the front. This was Sunday, they started with a hole in the ground on Friday afternoon. The foundation was laid, the house was framed, roofed sided, sheetrocked, and they were painting it in 3 days. There were swarms of people around in blue t-shirts. Each crew has a specific task, when done, they get out of the way for the next crew. We couldn't see much, and the only cast member we saw was Eduardo (I think, I don't watch the show). After standing around gawking at nothing for an hour, we were lucky to only wait 15 minutes for the bus back to the car. I kept telling her we should leave, but she wanted to see Ty. Of course we didn't, he wasn't even there. About the same time we were there, my niece ran into him and some other cast members at a gas station in Brookings.

I thought it was a waste of time, but apparently Mrs. Giraffe didn't, because she went back early this morning. She called to tell me she she was the third car there. Today is the reveal date, and they are only letting in 1000 people. It is now 2:30 in the afternoon, and I haven't heard from my wife yet. She has been there since 7:00 A.M. The family was supposed to arrive at 2:00. So, if I blog even less than normal, it is because my wife ran away with Ty Pennington and I have gone hunting him.

Thursday, September 07, 2006

Via email

I used to have a Labrador retriever & I was buying a large bag of Purina at Wal-Mart and was in line to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog(?). On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.
I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a tall, black guy who was behind her.Horrified, she asked if I'd been poisoned. I told her no, I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me.

I thought the black guy was going to have to stagger out the door.